-Ooh, they have the internet on computers now!
-Homer no function beer well without.
-Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what
separates us from the animals...except the weasel.
-I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there,
please save me Superman.
-Here's to alcohol, the cause of, and solution to, all life's
problems.
-When I look at the smiles on all the children's faces,
I just know they're about to jab me with something.
-Wha..ch.. Marge, thats the rhinestone nights fashion gun!
I need it to rhinestone up my old clothing!
-I'm writing a delicious send up of Mr. Burns for his birthday.
Is poo poo one word or two?
-Hey Flanders! You smell like manure!
-Moldy... Old...? I'm gonna get something to eat!
-Two all beef patties special sauce lettuce cheese pickles
onions on a sesame seed bun.
-Mmmm... 64 slices of american cheese...
-You bet your sweet... ass!
-I'm wizzing with the door open, and I love it!
-No!... Well, yes.
-Yeah. He appeared before me in a dream, and I knew that
was special because I usually dream about naked... Marge.
-Kids, let me tell you about another so-called wicked guy.
He had long hair and some wild ideas. He didn't always do what other people thought was right. And that man's name was...
I forget. But the point is... I forget that, too. Marge, you know what I'm talking about. He used to drive that blue car?
-No offence Apu, but when they were handing out religions
you must have been out taking a whiz.
-Maybe, but you don't know Lisa, I mean she's so smart they
hooked her up to a big computer to try to teach it some things, but she had so much knowlege, it overloaded, and then it got
really hot and caught on fire!
-Give me all of your balloons!...I hope this works!... These
are for you if you let me use your cherry picker!
-Do you know how many memories I have? Three! Standing in
line for a movie, having a key made, and sitting here talking to you. 38 years and that's all I have to show for it.
-Stupid movies! Who invented these things anyway? Was it you
Bart?
-Really? A restaraunt? Well now I dont know what
to believe.
-Reading about this Edison character. They wont let
me in the big people library down town. There was some... unpleasantless; I can never go back.
-I think it's pretty obvious that I am... Go to School!
-He misread my pee! He misread my pee-ee!